This is not a rant but mere stating of facts!
(In case of some “sensitive” reporters)
My girls have chicken pox last week.
Once my mum got to know about neem leaves for chicken pox and her neighbour has the tree, she who doesnt know how to drive – straight uber to my house to send us the leaves. Then on the weekend, my hubby drove down to her house to get more neem leaves. Besides neem leaves, she cooked few dishes for us for next few days consumption.
On the other hand, the other side only “care” to find out what’s happening. Seriously, I feel it is more ‘care’ to kaypoh. And in the midst of our daily stress life, one of them even has the cheek to send in bills for my hubby to assist in paying (as in hubby help them with online transaction).
Note that I don’t have a perfect/good relationship with my mum – yet she still can do as much as possible to help. And my hubby even acknowledge (plus feel paiseh at times) how much my mum do for us in moments of help. Compared to….(ok, no good to compare)
I have three girls! Phew…i dont have to deal with mil/dil relationship 😅 (except maybe hearing my girls’ future rants). As much as i want them to be independent when they grow up, I too want to know that I would be by their sides when help is needed!
Sekian terima kasih!
Despite things have been settling quite well, I am at a juncture where life could be ‘lonely and miserable’ – as I slowly losing ‘contact’ with other people -largely because I am so handful lately (even during the nursing hours) – no hands to look for the phone and/or no fingers to type (probably only a thumb to ‘like’ some posts).
Me time (or teatime/ breakfast when the kids are still asleep) has been brief – running in and out handling one after another (toddler and newborn).
Many things running in the mind but I couldn’t ‘type’ them; couldn’t be bothered with it until I forget what’s in my mind – becoming more forgetful too!
I know (and hope🤞🏻) this is just a ‘phase’. And it will soon pass!
I usually ‘talk’ about myself/my kids or share my experience, putting my thoughts on how/what/why I should react. I don’t relate other people’s situation and help ‘them’ make a judgment call or expect how they should react.
My ‘thoughts’ are based on my own experiences. And my thoughts wouldn’t bother how someone feels – since everyone feels differently. Sorry to say – I am not a mind reader. It would be impossible for me to ‘care’ everyone’s feelings – if I do – there will be nothing to share.
‘Ignorance is bliss’, certainly the key phrase I learn thoroughout motherhood!
By posting my thoughts and our daily activities, it would also mean that we are prone to be evaluated. I do receive feedback and comments, in ways which could be annoying or understanding things at surface level. Many times I choose to ignore (not that I am NOT aware of those happenings)! Like it or not, whether we do A or B, people will HAVE something to say! And some might even scrutinise us – worse, without reflecting on themselves!
This is what I have learn throughout this 4 years plus. People who want to understand, will understand. And those who don’t, won’t. So why bother? Just let the latter continue to stand on their own podium to ‘preach’ like they know all, who know “they really do”. Plus if the persons have every intention to provoke for responses (insults are the most difficult to swallow)- the more we/I have to keep calm! This is difficult, of course – especially if it happens “first thing in the morning” and you/I will be thinking “how this person wants to ruin my day”!
Just be calm. The first few minutes to ignoring is difficult. But as the hours (and days) go by, it will be easier!
P/S: But I am certainly happy that some friends will, at times, stand up for me, even if I don’t. Some even messaged me on how ridiculous people are, and wish I could block those people off! 😅😅
This is really the most lousy cheapo stuff from Lazada ever! 😒😪🙄🤦🏻♀️. It has been an ‘annoyance’ since the day it arrived! 🤣 I think we were ‘better off’ using the recyclable boxes as storage boxes!
I could give up easily and hubby even said that we can get a better, new one! BUT, if I do so (not because of ‘maruah) it is more like telling my kids I am giving up easily! 🙄🙄🙄
There’s a ‘price’ for not giving up easily! 🤣 time wastage and frustration, of course!
They know I am annoyed by the rack. When I found that the rack came out again this morning, Noelle ‘cleverly’ pointed it to Nikki – indicating Nikki’s fault! 🙄🙄 Then when I was fixing it, Noelle requested to watch YouTube, which I rejected. Instead of ‘whining’, she obediently just played with her toys (because she knows she will get m16 from me if she does whine)! When she played with some of her jingsaw puzzles; she was annoyed that she can’t fix it and asked me for help – I looked at her and asked ‘how about me? 😒😒 who is helping me with this?’ That completely shut her! 🤐🤐🤣🤣 Nikki who was rampaging around the toys, also made u-turns seeing my frustrated face! And it was finally done before lunch!
But not long after lunch, Nikki touched it and it came down again! 🤦🏻♀️😫😤😡😒 I was ‘mad’ but Nikki ‘calmed’ me down by taking out her palm – to ask me punish (whack) her hand! Her pure innocence just cracked me out! 🤣
Ding dong here and there – I finally managed to fix it when they were napping! I even hammered it and cellaphone taped it! It is stable for now; hopefully it will stay – or else, we are really get a new one!
It is simple to give up in the beginning – at least not much effort put in. It is more difficult to give up midway- for the effort put in. And the most difficult to give up towards the end. But the end result when it came out right – it is a really a sweet satisfaction!
So, will you ‘give up’ for less than RM20 item? 🤣
I am just a stay at home mum (sahm) with no income and limited savings. I don’t need to impress others and people won’t benefit anything from being my ‘followers’. This would also mean that friends I made come with no motive!
True friendship is limited but I can assure you that there are great people out there (unrelated to us) who give a helping hand/ advice without expecting anything in return! Sincerely thank these people for being here for us!
We have met fabulous people in my 3.5 years journey as sahm!
I am on facebook to keep myself relevant. It can be quite lonely just being around the kids. I gave myself chance to make more friends (and yes i have growing number of friends compared to when I was working). i post updates to keep memories (and somehow it inspired some of you indirectly – sorry to say, it was never meant to be an inspiration😛 and on the other hand, i know it did somehow create some sense of competition – hence the “grimblings” or green eyes monsters).
But in the midst of all these, I am busy juggling with two kids (their activities, daily routines, etc), currently also in the stage of preparing for the new baby and i’m still battling morning sickness at night. All these – without any help (especially if my hubby has to come home late from work or has business dinners). And yet some still think I have time and leisure to gossip about them or coerce them to think/do alike (is like ‘for what’ – can it lighten my daily burden?). If you ever feel that, so ‘sorry’ about that – i have no time/energy to put up a battle. And a kind reminder that there is always the “unfriend” and “block” button if you think I am ‘stalking’ on you.
Never let negative people suck up your power! – Nicole Lee
Time reviews why certain people were critical about the choices i made.
I have learn to be so busy improving myself that I have no time to bother those who were critical of me or even for me to criticise others. Do not take my silence as defeat. I am thankful that I don’t have to hurt others for me to feel better about myself.
Yes, I could have made different choices in life but I did what I did. The key is I refuse to please others at the expense of my emotional well being!
I am not who I was. I have moved on. And that’s part of growing up/old!
One thing for sure is that I would continue to be self reliant to avoid being told that I am “indebted” to those people who gave out “that” little help!