Positive, positive ๐Ÿ’ช๐ŸปโœŒ๐Ÿป

Today is a finer day (despite after a long weekend)! โœŒ๐ŸปJust a little difficult to wake her up – but fooled around with her for 10-15 min then everything turns normal. She wanted papa to bath her and she even splashed water on him. Then she had breakfast, a raisin bun while playing with her time table! She was all fine until towards the end when she waited abit too long for papa today. Papa sent her off with everything looking good!

When we picked her up today, before I could ask her how was her day, she started asking me ‘mama what did you do today?’ ๐Ÿ˜‡ heart melted liao – then I described whatever I did including those things specially related to her such as making mango ice cream and tidying her toys!

I took advantage of the sample yogurts that we received today. I brought one pouch (in the cooler bag) along and put it on her booster seat in the car. I told her she was ‘rewarded’ for not crying when waking up; but I added that it could be better if she wakes up without hassle – hinting that she can further improve by sleeping early! She was indeed surprised and feel very happy.

So as we drove home, she became quite chatty too! She ate rice that tastes like ‘rice’ ๐Ÿคฃ She described to me again that they put their hands at the back when food is served – and everyone has to say out ‘teacher eat. Everyone eat’! ๐Ÿ˜‚Then she told me there were seven of them in class. She said that she played the piano, painted fish and played ‘make a string phone’ (she described to me – cups and string to talk to one another). I asked if she started writing – and said she did write today! (Anyway, the principal told me that she is catching up!)

All in all, today is a good school day. Hope this signifies a better start to future school days!

Mama feels more at peace, today!

Hang in there! Hang in there!

This week is one of the hardest weeks so far during motherhood years (4y11m)! I am going on an emotional turmoil! How could I be should emotional when it is just my (eldest) girl going to school? Can I just shake it off – I have just one less to care for half a day?๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜”๐Ÿ˜” No, I couldn’t careless!

I care ALOT about her feelings and how she will face it! And because of that – my emotions is going on a roller coaster ride! When she leaves home feeling sad or saying ‘I want mama’, I feel just very down. ๐Ÿ˜ขWhen she is away, I am ‘worried’ ๐Ÿ˜จ(and further down if she cried when she left!) The best part is picking her up – to see her happy face (hearing her call mama out when she sees me out of the car) – I feel so relieved! ๐Ÿ˜ŠEven happier when both the siblings playing together so hard because they miss one another. ๐Ÿ˜I feel sad/touched with her telling me how much she misses mama, Mei Mei and mui mui! ๐Ÿ˜” (she even remembered that i told her that she can feel mama by touching her heartbeat)! With going to school, she has become more ‘attached’ to me – she wants my attention and hug. Sometimes she comes to me with teary eyes. This coupled with tiredness, sometimes I do get mad๐Ÿ˜ค when her demands become so unreasonable, yet I feel guilty ๐Ÿ˜ซ for feeling mad! The worst thing is she misses papa too and papa is busy with work -coming home late night – imagine she woke herself up at 1130pm to eat and sleep with her papa! ๐Ÿ˜ญ

Seriously, I am goingggg ‘crazy’ soon but I know I have to hang in there! This is just a phase, a transition. Every phase comes with challenges and when it passes – you will just laugh at it! (Says a friend)

In a happier note, today when she saw me – the first thing she told me was – I played at the playground today and we picked leaves! I reminded her isn’t that similar to what we have done in the past. She even told me that there were 5 of them in class today! And she didn’t snack any of her snacks (but will eat them on our way back – which she did)! I saw her water tumbler and question if she finished it. She said yes and she can actually refill it in school!๐Ÿ˜ฎ Then she told me she ate rice, soup and egg for lunch! ๐Ÿ˜ฎI also told her what I (without Nikki in the pic – I didn’t tell her we went post office) did – like cooking, cleaning the kitchen and tidying up the bed! We also laughed about how Nikki slept on the floor while Norrah was on the bouncer. I showed her the picture too! I told her I got her more blueberries, dragon fruit and seaweed noodles from market today. I shared with her what me and Mei Mei ate for lunch too! ALL this small talks would not happen if she didn’t go school! So, I will definitely take this positively!

Anyway, I did hint that she needs to wear the uniform to school tomorrow. And she replied ‘ahaaaa’! (Meaning ok) Will see how it goes tomorrow!

My first born goes to school

Noelle was the reason I turned stay at home mum. Having spent 24/7 together from 13 months old to 59 months old and being the firstborn, every milestone seems more emotional!

Just as planned, we are sending her a year of kindergarten as a transition to primary school! And also, we think she will be ready by then (now)! We have been looking around for a suitable school since early of the year – our criteria – school serves healthy food (junk prohibited) and the kid does not require to bring homework back home! It doesn’t really matter the method of teaching – as long as it makes sense – since Noelle has done fair bit of home schooling with me (and homeschooling doesn’t stop when she goes school)! It seems ‘simple’ criteria but we could say it isn’t that easy to spot one!

We visited the chosen kindy few times – bringing Noelle there twice actually. From excitement, she actually turned skeptical as the days gets closer – making mama panic. I had butterflies in my stomach (I felt like my mama was sending me to school instead ๐Ÿ˜‚)!

Even before she left for school, she said ‘I don’t want to go school’! I told her if she misses us, she could just put her hand on her heart and feel the heart beating which signifies ‘us’! I told her she will be doing the same kind of thing like she used to do with mama except different setting, with teacher and some friends! And when she is back home, everything will be back as usual!

Papa took the job of sending her to school this morning (and every morning) while mama just bid goodbye at our home door (while putting a brave front of her!) It would be a lie if I said I didn’t tear after she left! ๐Ÿ™„I bath her and dress her up this morning (usually she does herself) and even fed her croissant (while playing her cashier thingy) when she was reluctant to eat!

It was a partial relief when hubby said that she bid goodbye to him without any tear; only looking down! Much more relief to hear from the principal (when we picked her up) that she didn’t cry at all thoroughout the session! (I am pretty ‘sensitive’ on this cry issue because I was once in her shoes before – and I was always a laughing stock because of this crying issue!)

First day – everything was fine with her! She showed her smiling face when we picked her up! There were two trial kids – the other kid did cried but Noelle didn’t. The principal mentioned that she just stared at the crying friend. The only comment made by the principal was Noelle hasn’t adjust to her eating time. They gave them bread at around 9sth and she told the teacher she was hungry at around 10sth. Fortunately I packed some snacks for her in the bag. (In fact, Noelle told me that she told teacher she needed to eat blueberries as she was having flu! ๐Ÿ˜‚) I told her principal it was because Noelle enjoys snacking when she’s at home! The principal also mentioned that she was adjusting well with the clique of friends.

It is a good start – because what we expect is that she will be as happy as she is usually!

Back at home, she can’t stop telling us that she is 6 years old – though she is just gonna turn 5yo this month end (so difficult to explain – as she will be in the 6yo class in Jan 18)! She starts in Dec as the principal wanted to assess her before placing her in either of the 6yo classes!

Noelle didn’t really sound exactly like she is excited for tomorrow but she did tell me the kind of snack she wants me to pack for her tomorrow. Also, she did mention her desire to have the same dress as her friends (uniform)!

Today the whole family came picked her up from school – tomorrow it will be just mama, Mei Mei and mui mui. Yes, we have a new schedule to adapt to!

Of course, Mei Mei misses her Jeh Jeh a lot!

Happy 6th wedding anniversary

Today marks our 6th wedding anniversary! We didn’t have any fanciful celebration but we went through errands (together with our three girls, of course) as any other weekends! In fact, we have more to do today compared to usual weeks! Tired is the word to describe BUT we are contented. I guess we are both more tired than six years ago when we went through the Chinese wedding ceremony and dinner!

Though I wish, our marriage is no fairy tale. We have undergone many ups and downs (which include the kids’ tantrum) especially this year – we stick through thick and thin; we support one another and that’s where we become great ‘partners’!

We ended today with a ‘bear’ theme dinner – which of course the two elder girls enjoyed the most!

We don’t usually do dinner outside! So, we do enjoy and appreciate every moment when we eat out! <video>

This cafe is perfect for kids! In fact, we didn’t to bother about the noise the girls made because the place is packed with kids sound! So, we were just ‘cool’ having dinner with most liked minded parents who just need a break to eat out (without being judged for having noisy kids๐Ÿคฃ)! I let ‘go’ a little and the kids dine outside completely! They get to choose a cake for their dessert too! It’s their anniversary; not ours! ๐Ÿ™„

Happy 6th wedding anniversary to my beloved hubby and bb! ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜˜

Independent and happier mealtimes

One is 23mo and the other is 4y11m yesterday! Yes, one more month to their big DAY! It is really just like a blink of eye – especially Nikki!

I am pretty happy that generally they behave quite well during mealtimes when I am alone with them! Usually, like today, I will just cook and leave it on the dining table – and they will settle themselves – while I handle Norrah, if she is awake and clingy (like today)! Most of the times (like today) I will be away on the sofa and get some rest while they eat. Sometimes they want me to sit with them.

There might be ‘food wastage’ but I still allow them to make their call to say ‘enough’ – usually they will eat a reasonable among. There might be mess (especially Nikki) but I often just close one eye! I don’t want to stress over mealtimes – my duty is just to ensure healthy home cooked meals are prepared! I even told my hubby to count whole week calories instead of per meal basis! Life much happier now during mealtimes!

Never stop trying or adventuring alone with kids

At times, I am put off from going out with three. Not only I have to watch over them carefully, but I have to figure out place that is convenient for me to get my stuff together with them!

Probably some will say ‘crazy lady, no use brain. Bring out three kids alone so dangerous you know?’ (I have not heard this yet la; self drama in my mind๐Ÿ˜‚)

Some will say ‘Yala, better stay at home’. Others will say ‘you did a great job! I admire you!’ (The ‘fans’ kinda friend). The better friends will say ‘please take care when you go out with them!’

But the best of all friends will say ‘Please don’t stop trying!’

Yes, I will never stop trying or adventuring with my girls!

Thank you for loving my kids

The ‘season’ is here. There are few books warehouse sales around. The gifting season is upon us (I have so many people on mind๐Ÿ˜ซ)! But one thing – I have to “clench on is my purchasing power”. Sadly, this is one of the saddest part of being a stay at home mum (sahm) – though my hubby never restrict me from buying anything – well, he gives me a credit card and there’s free-to-use cash at home but I always do have this enormous guilt of spending ๐Ÿ˜•- as we are a single income family! (And we never bet on lotteries! ๐Ÿ˜plus not on any financial cord.) If ever I spend more on something, there, of course, is something else that we need to forego. We are living on a piecemeal basis and I can’t afford to have my hubby being away always on weekends to work.

Since my postings about my girls – that was way back in 2013, I made a lot of friends. And some become so close that my girls treat them as real aunties! I am really not sure what’s the power of attraction but my girls especially Noelle has received many gifts from various mummies (aunties/ grand aunties). She always comes to people’s mind, I think. Well, although I am so grateful of the gifts she received (looking at their excitement when opening gifts), it has also become a ‘guilt’ part of me – as I could not return the same value (in terms of monetary) to them. From grateful to guilt, at times, I feel ‘shameful’ to receive or even to meet people!

But as I was relating this to a friend yesterday, she told me – ‘people are giving because they LOVE your kids; and not expecting you to give in return (if so, they won’t be giving)!’

Well…OK. So, I have to accept ‘receiving’ with an open heart – I remember saying this one or two years ago! And now brace through this kind of feeling!

Thank you for loving my kids.

P/S:

I used to record thankful messages but it then make me feels that I am ‘luring’ people to gifting – so, I have actually toned down!

But hey, if possible, don’t make me feel guilty anymore, don’t send my children presents! ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š