I am t.i.r.ed

It seems so ‘great’ that we are going out over the weekends- and some people are wondering why we never pop out at their doorsteps or have meals with them! The usual question ‘can’t you all make time for us?’

Saying ‘yes’ seems so easy but how would it be if you are in my shoes?

Yes we do go out and have our family life – because four of us ARE family; plus most of the going outs are groceries shopping, running errands, taking the elder girl to explore and for myself- a breather from everyday life.

Yes we passed few rounds of eating meals outside but do you know that – how fast we eat or how we contain the situation? And you expect us to wait on certain occasions?

Yes, one hour of our weekends may mean so little to you all – but one hour can eat up half or maybe whole day! 

How much time to get ready? Time to go there? Time there? And time back? 

PLUS – while you think is ‘fun’ to play with the kids- at the end, who is handling the kids during visitation and who is enjoying!

Also, if we make time, is ‘your’ total self present while we are there? Wait a minute, do we have to account for your schedule too?

Not forgetting, what are the conversations? Are you comparing/judging the kids again? Are you going to tell us gossips of who and who – which does not matter?

Please remember how much one hour means to a stay at home mum like me who doesn’t even get a peace 30 minute in a week! Yes kids do go to sleep and nap – and that time is either me sleeping or running 101 things so that I can spend time with them while awake! Not forgetting  – as kids/babies grow, they nap/sleep less! 

And if you think I have so much time to type this out now – wait, I am on the bed with two kids napping while one of them is nursing to sleep – I have no choice but to lie together even though my mind is alert!

One hourrrrr onlyyyyyy! I can’t even shop myself in 10 minutes! I can’t even take an accumulative one hour bath in a week! Don’t even talk about toilet breaks! 

I count myself lucky if I could eat one meal peacefully in a day – wherelse YOU can eat every meal peacefully, sleep peacefully, jolly with your friends and then cryyyyyyy that there’s no bonding between YOU and MY kids (not forgetting – the respect that YOU need to give to my kids)! 
I don’t earn income but I am not paid too.  But who cares right? The ‘pity’ only goes to the breadwinner- who can has much ‘luxury’ as YOU when away for work! At least he has a personal lunchtime! He goes to the loo unattended. Plus he can freely do his stuff – even leaving us behind for ‘errands’ like servicing car, managing properties and etc! How I wish I am the one running the errands, sometimes. (Well, I do encourage him to attend social gatherings BUT – choose those that can give personal grooming than listening to nonsense!)

So how much time do I need to give YOU if I don’t even have time for myself? Yes people are getting old and will ‘die’ soon/ one day BUT who cares if I drop dead on bed at the very next moment! 

** I know I am sarcastic today! 

One thought on “I am t.i.r.ed

  1. You have said what I have in my heart too! This is not only for a SAHM, even a FTWM like me, I only wish to spend my time with my kids as a FAMILY OF 4.

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