Growing up in an extended family – means a lot of comparisons made when I grew up! Well, while the adults don’t feel it or bother, I have the sense of exclusion many a times – but ‘who’s really going to bother when everyone is happy except me?’ Right?
The rich was the goddess while the ‘poor’ was like peasant or the crowd that made most noise.
One incident that I will remember – there was a stage where kids started to cook! Yes, I did too! But so? What was the big deal? Then came another girl who could ‘fry egg’ – and the whole ‘village’ went huha about it; one after another ‘ordering’ fried eggs! Yes, she became the limelight- even my parents ‘made’ me feel bad – as they got into the ‘game’ too! I wasn’t acknowledged at all! That was the kind of environment that I grew up in especially those weekends (which supposed to be family time).
I promised myself I will never make my children feel that! Even my girl spreads ready made peanut butter into my bread (which she has been doing for some time), I will tell her ‘it’s yummy!’ every single day! (Not only when they have grown up)
Praise them enough that they are confident of themselves. Praise them enough to tell them that they matter to you even at a very young age. Make them feel important!