Speak it out! 

Hubby received a call from a bank yesterday and it was from a branch near to where his sibling lives. He says that it is related to referring his ‘friend’ for a current account. From that point, I doubted it was this ‘friend’ but his sibling (which I am not in good terms with)! It was a ‘small’ matter but the fact that he did not tell the ‘truth’ bothers me a lot. I didn’t brought it up as I had a very tiring day plus I don’t want a confrontation in front of the kids! 

I woke up today feeling deep grudge it me, expecting a badddd day! I fear I might take it out on the kids (like snapping them)! After he came back from his morning jog and prepared to eat his sandwich, he saw me look very down and asked what happened! I took chance by letting it out! 
The first thing I said ‘you think I stupid ar? How many friends you have staying in that area? 😒😒😒 you think I duno is for who? If you can lie this behind my back, in the future, how I know you will sign something that liable the family? Or, you lied to cheat with other woman! It is the small things that builds up’ I added by giving him some examples/reality (within the extended family) that happened. 
He admitted and apologize! And said that he wasn’t frank with me because he knows I will be unhappy – true enough, I will be unhappy but I rather he not lied! 
Anyway, it was a small matter (as long the help does not liable the family or takes off the family time)! 
**But I wonder how some people like to ‘proclaim’ that they have sooooo many friends, at the end of the day, still look for ‘us’ when help matters (only to them)!
The point is – like what i pointed out, speak out and find out when the matter is small. Plus, I feel much lighter after speaking out, at least I will have a great day ahead with my two girls! 
Great day mummies!

One thought on “Speak it out! 

  1. Men always thought that if they don’t tell, we won’t know. Whenever my external family member calls, my husband will go off my vision, “hoping” that I won’t hear their conversation. And my external family is one of those that if they don’t need you, they won’t find you type. Whenever they called, some ridiculous requests will be made. Eg. my SIL called and requested my husband to be her guarantor to obtain a loan because her MIL told her that she will not help her son because she doesn’t trust him that he will take care of their family and if they wanted her help, their house’s ownership must be co-owned with their other son. My MIL/FIL will call and tell him that they wanted to go for holiday with their elder son, youngest daughter and the middle daughter’s family (she is married with a kid) so they need funds/”sponsorship” for all of them (bearing in mind their elder son is single and earning decent pay whilst the married daughter and her husband both doctors earning more than us!). When I married this man, I don’t have dowry and we paid for the wedding reception at their request. Nonetheless, all the angpaus went into my external families’ pocket, a substantial portion of it went to the SIL on the basis that she bought some real cheap red wine (but she claimed was very expensive) and her then boyfriend now husband took half dozen of them back home! When we went to Europe last year, she gave him a long long list to shop for her on our expense but when I told her off, the relationship turned even worse. During this year’s CNY, coincidentally was hubby’s birthday as well. She bought a cake for him and wanted him buy their family good dinner the next day! Was so glad that we stay so far from them and don’t have to see them so often! Once a year is already my limit for now. Be it calculative or not, this kind of people never satisfy with their greed. Every phone call/text messages/whatsapp made me uncomfortable. Speaking out does help but whenever I speak out, it will end up with another day of cold-war.

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