I personally want to handle my confinement alone because I don’t want to abide by the unnecessary traditions that could/ would definitely be imposed by the elderly. I did not want to have a confinement lady because I heard many of horror stories about them and that I did not want to be nagged unnecessary plus I wanted to save cost. But the main reason is I wanted to exclusively breastfeed little 17chipmunks – if I were to have people around me that have lacking of exclusively breastfeed knowledge – it will definitely failed. When anyone offered to give help, I actually ignored or refused them. The most that we went was to have a confinement caterer.
Two days after the arrival of little 17chipmunks, I was rather depressed as I could not handle my little one totally alone because I was still in pain. This was because the emergency c-section was totally not in mind at the first place. At the end, I got my mum to stay with us for about 5 nights. Well, totally appreciate her presence to guide me – but all the 5 nights, I did handle little 17chipmunks independently and alone – hubby was still not too well at that time. At the same time, we got the confinement caterer food sent to our place – with mum presence, she tends to boil additional soup or drink for me. And, if mother in law comes, so will she bring food. Nevertheless, their practices did go against mine actually such as bathing baby in herbal bath and Guinness stout. However, I managed to “save” little 17chipmunks from being bathed in Guinness stout – thanks to Dr Syed’s advice, right in front of hubby. Also, it seems so funny that when it comes to my confinement period, everyone has someone they know that did not follow the confinement tradition and end up suffering. Well, I should reserve this page and re-post in 20-30 years time – and tell everyone if I regretted not following the tradition – for example, did I get migraine because I washed my hair and air entered into my head.
I am also annoyed with remarks such as:
- Especially on the day when we just returned from the hospital – I can feel my parents and to some extend my hubby have no confidence that I could fully breastfeed my little one. My parents even started filling up the containers with milk powder so that they can feed my baby on the go whenever she needs.
- True that I could not provide fully breastfeed on the first day we returned from hospital, but thereafter I have exclusively breastfed her. Thanks to my own determination!
- Why is your baby always hungry? (Because they don’t understand what is feed on demand)
- Baby needs to drink water. It is heaty. (Because they don’t understand that there isn’t need for water for exclusively breastfed baby)
- Wrap your baby because she wants to feel the warmth in the stomach (but eventually this is debunked because baby has heat rashes)
- When the baby does not wake up during midnight, let her sleep on. (Well, baby is just few days old that time and it is advisable to wake her up for feed and not to let her doze off – according to the breastfeeding classed I attended. Moreover, baby has slight jaundice and she needs to drink more to poo more.)
Thankfully, this is just own parents. If more relatives come into place, there will be more havoc.
Thereafter mum’s five night stay, we had the nights ourselves – but most nights, it was me only because I am the only one that could latch the little one and feed her – through breastfeeding. After the week when hubby had his paternity leave, it left me and baby – with occasional visits from my parents, which I saw as totally inconvenient especially with the presence of my dad when I want to breastfeed freely at home. After that, my parents went holiday and left me alone. On the first day, little 17chipmunks started to have colic attack – I really did not know how to handle the crying and made me cried as well – till hubby has to return home from work or he sends his sister to accompany me. I really never expected such stress that could cause depression. It was heartache seeing my baby suffering and not knowing what I can do for her. At the same time, I started thoughts like – losing my freedom and became burdensome to hubby – and did my decision to handle confinement myself correct. Over the weekend, I eventually overcome it – when hubby went off to fetch his mum and did shopping for me.
I have handles little 17chipmunks and the colickly her since Monday alone. I am getting used to it. I just feel quite troublesome waiting for Tracey to send me the food – because at times, it coincide with baby’s feeding time – but, the wait is worth it as I definitely have no time to cook for myself.
Hope I will be fine in the rest of the month(s). And, I pray that little 17chipmunks will suffer less with her colic condition. Please bless her. Amen.